Another bad week
It is 3 o'clock in the afternoon and I am lying in bed with my hot water bottle feeling very sorry for myself. The sun is shining and I am lying here looking out at a very calm sea. I feel quite 'down' and I don't know why.
I met friends for coffee this morning and had a good long chat - I even made a new friend (funny how you just suddenly meet someone and instantly get along.....?) I should be feeling quite positive as I've only 13 more jabs to go after today. Thirteen sounds so close to being finished with this stuff - it can't go fast enough. I think I am feeling so down because I am so fed up with not feeling right. I am having to take pain killers daily and now my stomach feels quite nauseaus and my head feels groggy - how on earth I managed to get through the first 7 seven months without any of this is amazing.
I did find myself a sports masseuse who came along to my house last Tuesday. He spent 3 hours massaging - he said I had the Himalayas on my back! A 3 hr massage - it sounds idyllic but I can tell you it was 3 hours of pure hell and agony. The good news was that I felt like a rag doll afterwards and didn't have to take pain killers for 2 days. He's coming again on Thursday and I can hardly wait - masochistic or what?
I read some of the comments on my Blog today and I want to thank you all for taking the time to write - your encouragement does help. I stay in touch with the little band of other heppers here on the Island - it's just great having people around who understand exactly what you are going through, although there are times when I tire of hearing myself rabbiting on and on about my plight. I don't feel sorry for myself, I am just fed up with feeling unwell.
My Riba rage continues... I am the most intolerant person I know. I take on strangers, department stores, government, whatever... I know I am doing it but can't stop myself. I can hear my dad apologising quietly so I know I've overstepped the mark. And then I 'stalk' off - well, more of a quiet hobble really - my 86 year old father walks faster than me and carries the groceries!
The sun is just beginning to set over the sea so I will sign off and enjoy the tranquility and the remainder of my hot water bottle.
Bye....
I met friends for coffee this morning and had a good long chat - I even made a new friend (funny how you just suddenly meet someone and instantly get along.....?) I should be feeling quite positive as I've only 13 more jabs to go after today. Thirteen sounds so close to being finished with this stuff - it can't go fast enough. I think I am feeling so down because I am so fed up with not feeling right. I am having to take pain killers daily and now my stomach feels quite nauseaus and my head feels groggy - how on earth I managed to get through the first 7 seven months without any of this is amazing.
I did find myself a sports masseuse who came along to my house last Tuesday. He spent 3 hours massaging - he said I had the Himalayas on my back! A 3 hr massage - it sounds idyllic but I can tell you it was 3 hours of pure hell and agony. The good news was that I felt like a rag doll afterwards and didn't have to take pain killers for 2 days. He's coming again on Thursday and I can hardly wait - masochistic or what?
I read some of the comments on my Blog today and I want to thank you all for taking the time to write - your encouragement does help. I stay in touch with the little band of other heppers here on the Island - it's just great having people around who understand exactly what you are going through, although there are times when I tire of hearing myself rabbiting on and on about my plight. I don't feel sorry for myself, I am just fed up with feeling unwell.
My Riba rage continues... I am the most intolerant person I know. I take on strangers, department stores, government, whatever... I know I am doing it but can't stop myself. I can hear my dad apologising quietly so I know I've overstepped the mark. And then I 'stalk' off - well, more of a quiet hobble really - my 86 year old father walks faster than me and carries the groceries!
The sun is just beginning to set over the sea so I will sign off and enjoy the tranquility and the remainder of my hot water bottle.
Bye....
1 Comments:
Hi Tink,
So sorry to hear you're feeling so poorly. The bad days really are bad with this stuff. Although, your line about your dad carrying the groceries made me laugh - I had my entire extended family incorporated into bringing in the groceries - one of the greatest things for me post treatment is having the strength to lug them home from the market myself. The loss of independence is painful.
Your comment about him apologizing for you also struck a cord... I was aware of the "meaningful eye contact" between my husband and sons when riba rage got the best of me.
Your strength is amazing and you are inspiring, Tink. I hope that the next 13 weeks pass by very quickly for you and that you have some relief from these nasty side effects. Take care,
Sue
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Sue, Toronto, at 1:27 pm
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